This concert was weak.

There, I said it. WEAK!

This is not to say that it wasn’t enjoyable; it was…very much so. However, it suffered from some very damning flaws that stifled the enjoyment of something that so many had been waiting for, for so long: the first North American appearance of the likes of Gackt and Yoshiki in concert. Honestly, unless you were a die hardest fan of any of the newly formed Autobot gestalt team known as SKIN, there was really a lot that just plain flat out could not be forgiven, and I may well be overestimating the good will of that deadly species known as the fangirl.

I would say the problems first started about a month before the convention even began. I don’t know for certain, but they only announced the fact they were going to appear at AX at Fanime, and it seems like AX had about as much warning as well. One month before AX started…is INSANE, but I’ll save that for later. You can well imagine anyway how much of a clusterfuck that must have been in ticketing sales, schedules, and whatnot.

It happened on Day 1 of the convention, and from what I saw, people were lining up for the concert nearly right after the opening ceremonies let out. Given the fact the damn concert didn’t start ‘til around 19:00 or so, people were in for a very very long wait. This is in the middle of the LA summer; I’m honestly surprised people weren’t dropping out of line and packed in ice to preserve what little remained of their bodies. I wound up out there close to when it was supposed to start seating only to wind up waiting another three hours. I tried to avoid what I knew what would happen to me in an extended stay outside, but it looks like it pick on the hordes of otaku undead day as even the most practical were made to bake until we were a nice crispy brown. Skuld laughed, and laughed, and laughed.

The line eventually started moving, but it was that slow inexorable crawl of time…I’m certain I watched bacteria gaining sentience as I moved about three feet. Getting to the front of the line, we found out why. Those friendly good people (this is heavy sarcasm, by the way) in yellow shirts, known as Staff Pro had been tapped to check baggage. You must understand, before hand we’d been told no cameras, no props, no weapons, and no food/drink of any sort allowed. On later events they recanted on the water, as they were probably staring at a lawsuit and/or jailtime for several of them considering the long waits and harsh sun. They were doing the full pat down…the whole nine yards. Don’t worry girls, they had…things that passed for women…checking the young ladies going through so don’t fret about that. Yes, yes, I know what you’re thinking about what’s on phones now adays…I’ll get to that in due course.

There are three reasons I heard for this hellacious wait to get inside. The first one I heard was a continuing plague of technical problems, up to and including a moving stage malfunction. I didn’t see anything moving on that stage, other than the band members and some robotic camera arms, so either that is bullshit or that got cannexed. Regardless that was bullshit, they should have just filed people in, had Gackt come out and give a statement to the effect of we needed to get you guys in here because it’s hot as fuck outside, but we can’t start yet due to technical difficulties. We will play, and all that rot. This would have been fine, and kept people from baking as long as they did.

The second, and possibly more damning scenario, involved the manager of the band and a possible DVD of this concert being made. It’s been stated that the manager didn’t want to start letting people in the concert until the line outside was truly big enough to fill up most of the area that the cameras would be filming to make this DVD. So the delay and quite literal harm done to the people outside staying in that heat (there was no water going up and down the lines at all, as is usual at the very least for events like this where the lines go outside) and the three to four hour delay was for the sake of someone’s ego and/or pocket book. If this is the case, I hope word gets back to the band about what conditions were like outside and what the fans were forced to endure. I would expect one fired manager in this case.

The third involved reports that the band was just not satisfied with their rehearsal performance, and was continuing to rehears up well past time for them to start. Now, I’m not one to complain in most cases but uhh…see the first thing I said about this concert. What was there was perfect, and I cannot fault them for their dedication. However, if you’re still rehearsing for a 40 MINUTE performance well past the time you’re supposed to start after five days of nothing but practicing, chances are, you’re doing something more fundamentally wrong than missing a couple keys. Just my opinion.

Regardless, Gensao and I get inside and get to our seats. I wasn’t insane enough to get into the sea of fangirls, lovely as a thought that might seem, by buying premier tickets at $50 a pop, but our hotel tickets got us seats along the side with a damn good view of the whole shebang, regardless. We hung out and waited for the rest of the con goers to file in, and laughed about how many cameras, not to mention camera phones, just popped up out of nowhere.

To the people who run these things: WELCOME TO THE 21st CENTURY, YOU MOTHER FUCKERS!!! Pretty soon people will have the equivalent of 1080p video recorders with 7.1 sound pickup capabilities wired into their left testicles and powered by the sexual stimulation the likes of Gackt exude. You cannot prevent or stop this, nor should you ever try.

In any event, we later learned it wasn’t even the cameras that weren’t allowed. The SKIN guys had no problems with people taking pictures at their conventions…it was the video cameras that they were concerned about. To that, I can only say, see above. One of my oldest cameras has audio/video recording capabilities, so it goes without saying what a modern camera can do and at what quality. Fuck, you can see clips of it on Youtube, and every single one of those bastards are going to buy your DVD, as will several others who just watch it on Youtube.

The concert began with a showing of names of the band members on the movie screens. Before that, we were being treated to an almost surreal musical set, I’d equate with Enya or the like. There were two movie screens, one to either side of the stage, and a third, further out into the audience from what I recall. The movie screens were then used as a sort of quasi disco/industrial mood enhancement tool throughout the rest of the concert. They showed scenes of the band playing, random images of mountains and such, rapidly shifting colors and graffiti with random words, lyrics, and were also used to introduce each song. All in all, fun to look at, but it was not a good idea to stare at it if you were prone to seizures. In fact, I would actually say, as well choreographed as it was, what played on those movie screens was, by and by, far too distracting, when I’d rather be watching the band.

After the onscreen intro was done, the curtain dropped to reveal the band to the thunderous roar of a billion screaming fangirls whose premier ticket seating had just become an Arokalypse mosh pit, Lordi be praised. I watched one lonely fanboy who had made the mistake of buying premier tickets be torn to screaming bloody shreds by the hordes of kawaii sexiness, and was quickly consumed. Stupid bastard should have known better, Darwin was once again vindicated. Everyone who had seen the video that Gackt did for “Dirge of Cerebus” recognized that microphone Gackt was using. I gotta admit: that thing kicks serious ass. What amazes me is that, even though a great many of them were outside for hours waiting, dehydrating themselves to the brink of oblivion, that they still had enough strength to shake that arena to its very foundation for the entire concert, short as it was.

First song in the line up was one called Gei-Sha. Don’t ask me what it was about, I haven’t got the slightest. All I know is that though there wasn’t much to this concert, what there was, rocked hard. So hard in fact, I was screaming, while making the occasional comment to Gensao, who was leaning in as if I were whispering. It was loud and proud.

As the songs progressed from the second song, “Killing You Softly,” to the third “Beneath Your Skin,” we were treated to the sight of what has become a staple of J-rock and Gackt concerts. We had Gackt and Miyavi doing things like humping the drumset, band members humping each other and the like. Suigizo was outright making love to his Guitar, there was no two ways about it. And Yoshiki? That man was putting Kenshiro’s speed to shame with how fucking fast he was pounding out the beats on the drums…you could not SEE his hands move. Between the third and final songs was a short interlude where the band members, all of them (except for Ju-Ken, who seemed to just be there because SKIN lacked a bassist), swapped instruments and performed a soothing instrumental. We had Gackt on the piano, Yoshiki on the piano, Miyavi on the shamisen, and Suigizo on the violin.

Then came the last song, “Violets.” This one was performed very oddly. First thing to note about it, was the continual refrain “Get Back!” which was done, over and over and over and over and over and over again, with full audience participation. Gackt would scream “Get Back!” and then the audience would get to scream, “Get Back!” Makes me wonder what the rest of the lyrics said. I would like to say the song was repeated, but on further reflection it was more like it was just one long extended song with a rather long part in the middle where we had the band, well, Gackt mostly, playing with the fangirls…err…the audience.

Now one of the staples of a Gackt concert is bottled water. Bottled water drank by Gackt and then tossed out to the audience. Several bottles of water met their end this way. I wonder if the bottles wound up on ebay? I wonder if the bottles had what was left of their contents drank? I wonder if said bottles were then hermetically sealed as Gackt’s lips touched it? Perhaps some combination of the above? Who can say? What I do know is that these things were more hotly contested than the winning homerun baseball from the Cubs at the World Series would be. Like that will ever happen. Then we had Gackt spraying water all over his band mates as they played their instruments impromptu. Hell, Miyavi practically took a shower in Gackt spit. Mind you, he wasn’t the only one as the first few rows of fangirls damn near bathed in the bottled water that was coming from his mouth. Gackt, Gackt, Gackt…you keep dying at concerts. Try drinking some of that water, or better, mix it up by drinking some Gatorade too. We have Costco over here; you can get the stuff in bulk. Multiflavor packs man! Orange, Red, and Green! A kaleidoscope of nuclear flavor!

The fangirls were loving it. Pictures and video were taken of it. I was laughing my ass off during it. Then came the part I really have to say they should probably learn what subliminal messaging was for. I mean, they had the perfect tool to use it with too: those movie screens with that psychedelically awesome video mashup. Still, though crude, SKIN’s method of mind control was highly effective. It went something like this:

Gackt: “We are: SKIN! We are…?”
Audience: “SKIIINNNN!!!”
Gackt: “We are…?”
Audience: “SKIIINNNN!!!”

It went on like that for about ten minutes. Gackt occasionally mixed it up with more bottled water hijinks. After a few hundred iterations of that, it was burned in whatever passed for our minds who these guys were, and who just provided us with the rather short bit of entertainment we were given. I kinda felt like an experiment at this point; with his spiked hair he might as well have asked, “Wanna be my guinea pigs?”

Put your hands down.

Before moving on with “Violets” again, Gackt introduced the band. Miyavi, Ju-ken, and Yoshiki were pretty standard intros as far as any concert goes. However, Suigizo had an introduction that will likely live on in the minds of everyone there. Gackt walks up, puts his arm around Suigizo and says, “A couple years ago, I hated this man’s guts! Now, he’s my best friend!” The mind boggles at what could have gone on there. Get your minds out of the gutter, you Yaoi fangirls!

Then it was time to finish up the concert with the rest of “Violets” which really just equated to lots more of the refrain, “Get back!” with audience participation. I’d pretty much screamed myself hoarse by this point, however, many others hadn’t so it went on as long as the band wanted it to, which was for awhile.

Once the singing ended, SKIN did something I’d not seen done in a long time. They completely destroyed the stage. Suigizo actually smashed his guitar all over the place and threw the string board into the audience. I know I saw several fangirls go after that thing in a blood induced frenzy of carnage and violence. I’m not sure how many died before a victor finally claimed it. Wonder if went on ebay or in someone’s personal collection? Regardless, then we had Yoshiki throw his drum sticks into the audience and obliterate said drum set, with a finishing running drop kick that landed him right in the middle of the mess. Camera pans right over him as he lies there, on his back, just looking up…I thought for sure he’d done killed himself. Heh, nah, he just stunned the shit out of himself, as he wobbles back up throws his arms in the air in victory...the crowd goes wild! Later I read that he actually cut his hand pretty bad there too. His response to that? “Hey, it’s rock and roll.”

It ended, finally, and all too briefly. Quite literally, I could not hear anything for a few minutes. The music was actually loud enough that I couldn’t hear one damn thing, which is actually pretty cool. We filed out slowly, but with deliberate purpose in order to start getting ready for the Anime Music Videos…such as that wound up going.

I have no complaints about what was in this show; none whatsoever. I hear there’s going to be a DVD, which would make sense as Gensao counted no less than seven cameras, one robotic moving constantly around the band at all times, a couple cameramen, and a few permanent placements. Since very little of them showed up on the movie screen, it can certainly be inferred that there will indeed be such a DVD, so you’ll be able to see the concert a lot better than those crappy youtube uploads. I hope they have that bad flashback mix in there as well...it'd be great ambiance at a party.

What I do have complaints on concerns both how the audience was handled before the concert, the duration, and the lateness of said concert. Forget for a moment, the fact we were at a convention and required the use of the Arena for many events, such as the one that should have had plenty of time to get ready after the SKIN concert: the AMV contest. The lateness contributed to how the audience was handled before hand. In that hot sun, leaving those people out there as long beyond the time of starting as they did is irresponsible. The way Anime Expo handled the line here was unconscionable, but pretty typical for the rest of the con, and they will be taken to task sperately. Then there was the duration…all that wait for so little. I dunno, maybe it was the fact they were just starting out that they didn’t have a lot of material. Maybe they realized they went over a little too far, and had to cut it short. Whatever the reason; this J-pop supergroup only played for about fourty minutes. Momoi did that impromptu, with no rehearsing at all, right after the AX Idol contest. Sure, it was likely not quite to the higher quality that concert was, but it was still pretty enjoyable by all accounts. Just sayin’ guys. For what people went through to see you, I’m not sure the reward was quite worth it.

It was still good to see, make no mistake about that. It just wasn’t the mind blowing experience it should have probably been for those of us who aren’t the hardest of the hardcore fans. Also I note Mayhem might have been right and wrong at the same time…I didn’t see anyone’s panties go flying or anyone’s boobs spring out, and that’s a staple of American concerts…it’s almost not a concert without that happening. However, just because I didn’t see it, doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. With some notable exceptions, all I could see was a sea of bodies down in the main seating area…there’s no telling if some boobies didn’t pop out or not. If they did, I certainly hope the band got their fill of looking…along with a hearty, “Welcome to the U.S. of A!” from all of us, heheheh.

Seriously though guys...burnt to crisp white balding guy.